Thursday, October 05, 2006


Tired me and crazy computer-I just published mid sentence. I go to where I left off...
SHE DOES ALL THE DISHES AND LAUNDRY. And she picks up/takes kids to school a few times a week. Always on T TH afternoons when I am working. I don't know how I'd get by with out her.
The hardest time of day is the early evenings and evenings we are all here together. Guaranteed if I try to get A. to do homework there is screaming, yelling, door slamming and related such fun on his part. All of which is directed at me. Later I am short fused and Mom is pacing and watching me in the kitchen repeatedly asking if there is something she can do, and sipping her sherry. Ki gets clingy and whinny and then Pops comes home-often grumpy after a 10 hour work day. I become the translator between the members of the group, and I am bugged by them all. I can't get the kids to bed soon enough and usually it is later than it should be. I relish the thought of hiding behind my computer doing email, work and blogging. Or watching TV or reading in my cozy bed snuggling with sleeping Al. When I am really ready to check out I go to sleep with 1 or the other (or both) of the kids.
Ki said the other day. "Mommy, I haven't really made any friends at school, and I wanted to. I feel kinda sad."
Two weeks ago A. said, "Mama, I think I have dyslexia (or his pronunciation)."
"Why do you say that?"
"Because it is hard for me to read words."
Last week kids and granny and I were out for dinner. I took kids to the bathroom. When we came out Granny was at the front of the restaurant. Granny said when we were driving home. "Amiga (me), I don't know if I paid the bill. I really am losing it. Don't leave me alone. I can't be trusted."
Now I feel sad too.
So much to keep up with in life...

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